My Internship as an Evil Overlord Has Begun

I got a new monitor at work, today. A Dell UltraSharp 2007FP. It's a 20" LCD with high resolution. A thin, black bezel (I don't know what a bezel is, either, but that is what the review says) frames the screen, and a slim neck extends from the Y-shaped base. In addition to being able to adjust five inches up or down, the neck can swivel horizontally 45 degrees to the left and right, 20 degrees back, and 5 degrees to the front. The result is the first monitor in my adult life that I don't have to hunch over to see.

All this viewing real estate has generated some interesting side effects. I now have irresistible urges to cackle, "BWAAAH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!" when I'm asked a question and I find myself monologuing at the slightest provocation. On a completely unrelated note, does anyone know of any obscure, defunct countries in need of a tyrannical dictator? Canada, perhaps?

mw

Our Only Hope is That Quebec Surrenders

Joe: Why are we losing so much in Ottawa?
Me: The exchange rate. The Canadian dollar is living around 1:1 right now, and they stopped hedging this project last February.
Jason: Do you think it will swing back the other way?
Me: I don't think until October or November at the earliest.

*frustrated silence*

Joe: What can we do to improve the exchange rate?
Jason: We could invade Canada. Does anybody own a rifle?
Me: I have a .22. I'm not sure about bullets, though.
Jason: Bullets sound a bit like overkill. I wouldn't mind having at least four people, though.
Me: I just IM'd my sister-in-law; she said she's in, though I know you don't like temp labor.
Joe: I guess we can make it work. You guys don't mind working this weekend, do you?

mw

The Canadians Outwitted Us on Boxing Day

Rob: You taking any time off for Christmas?
Me: Yeah. I have PTO the two days after.
Rob: That's right. You guys don't get Boxing Day, do you?
Me: No. I think that is pretty much a Commonwealth thing. We're the revolutionaries, remember?
Rob: Sure, but while you were throwing off the yoke, you couldn't keep Boxing Day?
Me: I guess the Founding Fathers were too busy starting wars.
Rob: So why haven't you re-instituted it?
Me: Same reason, I suppose.
Rob: *chuckles*
Me: So what's the story with Boxing Day?
Rob: I don't know. I stay home and drink wine all day.

Something tells me I don't give Canadians enough credit.

mw