FHE: Thanksgiving

Tonight's Family Home Evening lesson was on Thanksgiving. Anyone want to guess which of the below were Caleb's?
Family
New job
Cars
Scriptures
Repentance
White car
Holidays
Health
Balloon
Good kids
Education
Blanky
Sleep
Five interceptions
Spike
Hot baths
Atonement
Teddy Bear
President Monson
Service
Grandma and Grandpa
Enough to eat
Music
Boppa and Diyah
Good books
Ability to work
More cars

m&n (+ Caleb)

You keep using that word...

I passed through a group talking in the hallway while walking to my office. I don't know what they were talking about, but I overheard this line.

Strange looking guy (not me): Dude, you're getting older. The synopsis in your brain isn't working anymore.

Funny on so many levels.

mw

Random thoughts from this past week

• I didn't post any random thoughts last week. Guess that means every thought I had was rational and logical. Be afraid.
  
• What is the sheer tonnage of bacon that has been boiled across the U.S.A. since the theatrical release of Better Off Dead?
• I didn't bring lunch today since we are having a budget working session and the CFO usually buys. Forgot the meeting was in Austin and I was dialing in.
• Bought lunch at the Fresh Aire [sic] Cafe on the second floor instead. Ordered the barbecue bacon cheeseburger. What I imagine used batteries taste like.
• Jocularity is a funny word. I wonder if they meant it that way.
  
• Coming up on the seven-hour mark of our five-hour review and I think the general manager is trying to explain how she can save me money on my car insurance. Somehow, this doesn't strike me as odd.
• I wonder how quickly divorce papers would be served if I took up the banjo.
• It's been two days and I've sat through nineteen hours of budget presentations and filtered through 2.3GB of bad forecasts that don't tie. We're only half done. There must be an intervention for this sort of thing.
• The trouble with being my age is that sometimes, for no reason at all, you get "Ice, Ice Baby" stuck in your head.

mw

To which I have no response

Me: Caleb, you need to drink your milk before you get down.
Caleb: I have a bumblebee in my mouth.

*blink, blink*

mw

Review: Get Smart

Comedies are a hard genre to recommend, one way or the other. What makes one person laugh out loud may be considered dull and prosaic by someone else. Hence the phrase, "Comedy is funny business." Get Smart is a pretty tame affair. With the exception of a few slapstick gags, most of the jokes are done deadpan with a sort of melancholy delivery that would have made Chaplin proud.

Steve Carrel stars as Maxwell Smart, a secret agent for CONTROL, who, along with Agent 99 (Anne Hathaway), attempts to stop the evil organization KAOS from taking over the world. Not much of a plot, but the movie is meant as escapist comedy, not social commentary...I hope. Carrel's version of Max Smart is less bumbling and more inexperienced than Don Adams, and his dry delivery of Smart cliches (e.g., "Sorry about that, Chief," "Missed it by that much," and "Would you believe?") turn them more into throw away lines than memorable catch phrases. This characterizes most of the movie, which gives due respect to the original television series without attempting to be a direct imitation of it.

If you are not familiar with the Get Smart of the 1960s, or if you are a die-hard purist, you likely will not enjoy the movie. Even if those don't apply to you, you still may not enjoy the movie. After all, "comedy is a funny business."

Neesha's favorite line:
"Bomb didn't go off."
"Oh, really, bright eyes? What alerted you? Was it not the boom-boom or the lack of a mushroom cloud?"
"It was the mushroom cloud for me."
Mark's favorite line:
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
"I don't know. Were you thinking, "Holy shoot, holy shoot, a swordfish almost went through my head?" If so, then yes."
Caleb's favorite line:
"Too bad about all the dead movie stars."
"Yes. What will we do without their razor-sharp political advice?"
Ainsley's favorite line: "Okay, not to keep dwelling on this, but that was some kiss. How did you know that would work? Have you kissed other men who then plummeted to their deaths? "

Rating:

• Buy it now
• Worth $10 at Costco
• Happy we rented it, but also happy we only rented it
  
• No good at any price
• That numb feeling at the top of your head? That's your cerebral cortex closing up shop

m&n

Random thoughts from this past week

• Has Bob Ross ever taken longer than 24 minutes to complete a painting?
• Danny Elfman is composing for the American Ballet Theater. Yes, that Danny Elfman. I want tickets.
• You have to get up pretty early in the morning to fool Mark Wright. Seriously, it gets me every time. Why are you up so early?
• Shredded way too much cheese for our dinner tonight. If you or someone you love needs shredded cheese, contact me IMMEDIATELY.
• Dear NPR: I will give everyone on your staff a dollar if you stop saying "anti-war protesters." No one is protesting anti-war.
• Just saw a commercial while watching the Alabama-LSU game where cows roam through an office building, turning on lights in various offices and it reminded me of something that happened at work. I need a new career.
• I wish my office network were a person so I could stab it to death with a rusty spoon.
• Drove past a hot chocolate stand charging $1 a cup. I think Exxon was the corporate sponsor.

mw

I stand corrected

Me: Caleb, you can't sit on the counter. You need to sit on the stool. You know that.
Caleb: No, I need to push those three buttons. You know that.

Hate it when he plagiarizes.

mw

From this morning's photoshoot

m&n

He's two, people

He's been spelling his name for several months, now, but it still amazes me. I stepped out of the bathroom this morning for a minute. This is what I found when I came back.

mw

Sweet

m&n

Letter to Senator McCain's aides

I was not excited by your selection of Governor Palin to be Senator McCain's vice president. My personal view, all joking aside and no animosity intended, was that she was not qualified to assume the role of commander-in-chief in the event her octogenarian running mate didn't survive the stress of leading the free world which, as a thought, wasn't exactly outside the realm of possibility. That is not meant as a commentary on any other aspect of her life, abilities, or personality.

Now, having said that...

I find it interesting that you are now attempting to pin the loss of the election on Governor Palin. You, who were responsible for crafting and running the McCain campaign. Despite not agreeing with some of her political views, this bothers me.

Governor Palin is who she is. She did not become more intelligent, or less so, during her nine week involvement with the campaign. During this time she did not become more qualified, or less so, to set the tone for the nation's domestic policy or to guide our country through an economic crisis, a health care crisis, an educational crisis, and a moral crisis. She also did not become more or less experienced in foreign policy, in bringing two long-running wars to an end, and in repairing our relationships with everyone we've upset over the past eight years (which, if you're keeping count, includes just about everyone outside the state of Texas and a couple counties in northern Idaho).

Yet, now, this same woman, pulled from relative obscurity and introduced to the nation as the next great vice president, is being maligned as an incompetent diva by you, the very people responsible for elevating her to the national spotlight. Whether or not grounds exist for such accusations is a point open to argument, but it is not the point in question, which is that you picked her. You. She didn't get the RNC drunk and surprise everyone the next morning. Nine weeks ago you put your arm around her, looked the country in the eye, and said there was no one in the country more qualified to serve as Vice President of the United States. She hasn't changed in the past two months. Only your story has.

For you to imply Governor Palin was responsible for Senator McCain losing the election 364 -163 (Missouri is still outstanding) suggests you are out of touch with reality, demonstrates an unwillingness to accept responsibility, assumes most people are ignorant enough to believe whatever they are told, and is characterized by a lack of integrity. Interestingly, those are the same criticisms made of the White House specifically for the past eight years, and of the Republican party generally for the past two.

Senator McCain's concession speech was pure class. That was the man I would have voted for in 2000 had he won the Republican nomination. That is who I hope would have been president had he won the general election this week. And that is who I hope he becomes again in the wake of his defeat, as opposed to the stranger you turned him into for the past eleven months. It is a pity you were able to change him more than he was able to change you.

mw

A finely-honed machine am I

In the past month:

• The Boy: two colds and three bouts of vomiting
• Ainsley: only one cold, but the poor thing has only been alive for seven weeks
• Neesha: two colds and one husband
• This guy: um...he's not well, but his candidate was just elected president
• Me: nothing. I am superhuman.

mw

Decision 2008

I look forward to the presidential elections. Almost as much as I look forward to the end of the campaigns. Though tonight, it would have been nice if the drama had been drawn out a bit longer. NBC seems caught off guard by how quickly Decision 2008 was decided and isn't quite certain what to do with the next three hours of programming. Right now, I think Brian Williams is missing Tim Russert.

In the end, Senator Obama is the President Elect. And there was much rejoicing (my last jab at Governor Palin).

m&n

While getting ready for church this morning...

Neesha: You are a good looking Caleb.
The Boy: And you a good looking mommy!

mw

Happy Halloween

m&n